Forgoing gifts can help lessen some of the financial burden that comes during the holiday season, but having that conversation with family and friends can bring about feelings of shame and guilt.

SA国际影视传媒淚f we work with the financial shame that arises before the conversation, itSA国际影视传媒檚 going to keep the conversation more grounded and less activated,SA国际影视传媒� said Chantel Chapman, CEO of Trauma of Money.

The high cost of living has left many households scrambling to make ends meet and put food on the table, let alone leave room in the budget for discretionary spending. But opting not to give gifts can be a hard decision and sometimes an isolating one if friends and family arenSA国际影视传媒檛 on the same page.

Researching whatSA国际影视传媒檚 happening in the broader economy could alleviate and validate some of the financial guilt you feel about your no-gifting decision, Chapman said.

SA国际影视传媒淵ouSA国际影视传媒檙e not the only person going through this,SA国际影视传媒� Chapman said. SA国际影视传媒淪hame will confuse us and make us think weSA国际影视传媒檙e the only ones.SA国际影视传媒�

Steve Bridge, a certified financial planner with Money Coaches Canada, said highlighting your big picture goals SA国际影视传媒� supporting your kids, saving for your kidsSA国际影视传媒� education or achieving financial independence SA国际影视传媒� could also help you overcome the guilt.

SA国际影视传媒淎lmost very rarely do I hear that, SA国际影视传媒楪iving expensive gifts is on that list,SA国际影视传媒橲A国际影视传媒� Bridge said.

Canadians are spending more than they make and many are relying on their credit cards to shop, with average credit card debt exceeding $4,300 in the second quarter of this year SA国际影视传媒� the highest level since 2007, according to Equifax.

At least 72 per cent of Canadians said holiday expenses are intensifying financial pressures, an October survey by Coast Capital showed.

Once youSA国际影视传媒檝e tamped down any negative internal feelings, itSA国际影视传媒檚 time to articulate your thoughts and have those tough conversations.

Chapman suggests starting the conversation with an opener along the lines of: SA国际影视传媒淟isten, as you probably know, itSA国际影视传媒檚 challenging right now out there for people and based on my investigation of my budget SA国际影视传媒� I feel that it would best if we shift the way we participate in gift-giving this year.SA国际影视传媒�

Working through feelings of shame also helps make the conversation less combative, Chapman said. It could even open the door for others to express similar concerns.

Susy Fossati, owner and director of Avignon Etiquette, suggests starting the conversation as early as possible and letting friends and family know your intentions.

SA国际影视传媒淎s soon as you know that you may need to go a different route from the traditional gift-giving, start to communicate that,SA国际影视传媒� Fossati said.

Fossati suggests making a phone call or meeting in person to have a chat about holiday celebrations and float the idea of a no-gift Christmas.

She said the conversation can be easy when approached honestly.

SA国际影视传媒淏eating around the bush is where things can become very complicated,SA国际影视传媒� she said, creating room for misunderstandings.

If a friend or family member still ends up bringing a gift after the no-gifts conversation has been established, Fossati suggests simply appreciating the gesture.

SA国际影视传媒淏ut thereSA国际影视传媒檚 no obligation to give a gift back just because you received something,SA国际影视传媒� she said.

Chapman said expressing authentic gratitude is key in such a situation.

SA国际影视传媒淩eciprocity doesnSA国际影视传媒檛 have to be another gift at equal or higher cost,SA国际影视传媒� she said.

Chapman suggested the concept of replacing the gift-giving tradition rather than restricting.

SA国际影视传媒淲hat if you came up with a replacement idea?SA国际影视传媒� she said. SA国际影视传媒淵ou could say: SA国际影视传媒業nstead of gifts, I want to focus my energy on spending time with you.SA国际影视传媒橲A国际影视传媒�

Fossati agreed. People often get caught up in giving gifts that are lavish or expensive, she said. But itSA国际影视传媒檚 about evoking the most basic emotions SA国际影视传媒� respect, kindness and consideration.

She says activities that donSA国际影视传媒檛 cost a lot of money but still bring joy and togetherness, such as a potluck, volunteering at a charity together or a book exchange could all be done in place of gifts or material items.

SA国际影视传媒淜indness is so much more than a gift wrapped,SA国际影视传媒� Fossati said.

SA国际影视传媒擝y Ritika Dubey, The Canadian Press